How can one be strong, yet so easy to hurt? How can one be so quiet, yet so loud without a single word?

The two rival each other. But not as enemies. Simply as companions in a complicated routine, one trying to fend for the other and vise versa.

The tension can as easily dissipate as it does present itself between them, such like friction. The music intense, hitting striking and hell like harmonies when they shake and struggle. At other times so harmonious it is terrifying.

One wears her scars and pain on her skin.
One wears her scars and pain in her mind.

They care and clash. Chaos. Pain. Frustration. Love. Dependent. Care.

I just care to much. And now I’ve bitten into my own skin to fight back the urge to scream that I’m not done! That I wanted to make us both happy. I do not depend on your choices, but I consider them when making my choices. As to how I was raised. My arm will hurt tomorrow from bite marks of upset. She wanted you to have an opportunity an opportunity you could’ve cared less about when you may care more about her cause she’s not inanimate. She is a person who should be treated equal. But she didn’t care and then suddenly….silence.

She drifts into dreams with upset in her mind. And you think……wow I should’ve just not said anything.

There are two sides to me. As is there to everyone. Hahaha though no matter what I’m still a loser

Snap chats of photos my best friend/roommate took of me and our other close friend, she wants to bring to light pollution endangerment of wild life only rather then use animals she chose to use humans. And so I became her lead model.

This particular shoot was to show humans in the perspective of being covered in oil and junk and crud. Sludge. And these are without edits as they are. I’m happy I am to be working with her and friends on this.

(The stuff on us is corn syrup, cookie, pomegranate juice, and dirt. Gotta love art. And your best friends) @tinyhaikuqueen thanks for sticking with me through this hilarious torture.

Good day with the girls and got all dolled up for my friend

I wish to be the best friend anyone can possibly hope for though I’m far from perfect. I wish to be the person I and my peers want me to be. I wish to find someone…..who wants me for me and not too crazy.

Conflicted. Broken. Lustful.

I’m so confused and conflicted. I got used and left then found someone else and I found this one who’s kind of what always pulls me in in an instant, one who’s broken and I believe likes me back, and one who is totally different from my norm. Though just recently A past chapter has just given me hurt and worry and upset. Part of me hates myself. part of me is glad to be me. Part of me is just so broken, confused, starving for a certain type of attention that it’s almost sad to watch.

Like scraping at a wall hoping to find the door that’ll take you out of the pitch black silent room that haunts you in your own head. I can’t find that door…..not long enough to open it and that is the type of attention I crave behind the door in the darkness. My mind is so conflicted my heart tears every which way and it’s not staying together well.

OOC: Random shots of the mun in her natural habitat

Progress! So much progress maybe you guys can’t see it but I’ll share it anyways, I’ve slimmed done and becoming so much happier with my own reflection, I’ve moved forwards past my relationships of the past and people filtered out of my life that aren’t needed anymore. I ended my last serious relationship cause it was time to move on. And now I’ve bettered myself for myself. And I finally feel like me. How I want to be, or at least at the beginning of who I want to become.

Over the course of 6 almost 7 months I couldn’t be happier with where I have gotten myself, and to my friends and to those I love so deeply, thank you. Thanks for your humor and love.

(Photos left to right, top row, July 4, 2016 and January 29, 2017)

(Bottom row left to right, mid august 2016, November 2016, January 2017)