Tag: from me to me

I really love going from who I am in real life (silly and dorky (semi-unimportant) art student) to going into cosplay, I love thinking I am a super hero. The feeling is even more magical then when I was a little one dressing as a princess. Now I do super heroes and more!

In black and white you never realize what you notice compared to a picture in color. Although you can see deeper into a person without color, you could lose the true face of a person with no color. My eyes, my mouth, the colors I wear tell you things that make up who I am now. Black and white can just show you more of the past.

I exist. Somewhere in their mind. Maybe for just a moment but being a good thought just for a moment in anyone’s thoughts, should be a pleasure. It makes me feel better. Maybe not all the time but hoping I appear there is just a nice thought. It means a lot.

Good thing no one reads these things. Heh, there’s something wrong with me isn’t there?

Holding on

I still cuddle a stuffy given to me from a guy who abused me.
I still have a postcard from another guy who abused me.
I have a picture I keep of me and an old friend, she used me
I still wrap myself in a blanket given to me by a best friend who abused me
I keep so much….so much….

I still keep memories or moments of the people who abuse me…..Why? Cause I’m sick and I miss them? Maybe, maybe I miss the good there was from my time with them? But it could also be because they remind me to move forward, to know where I was then and where I am now.

Or maybe, just maybe, I still keep them cause I want to remember everything. Even if it hurts? Who knows. But I’m better now. Better then I used to be.

sailormoon–serina-is-my-name:

The leaves rustle and the wind whispers.
I hear the voice of someone…..
My heart is frantic, pumping

The cold chills cripple my body immovable.
I feel the shock down to my spine.
My eyes closing, tired

Maybe someone will see this? Maybe someone will wrap me up.
Take the cold away.
Maybe make it bearable.

Never mind. anyone who sees this, the sum total of few followers. Maybe you will read this and thinks it’s a joke?

sailormoon–serina-is-my-name:

Do you feel alone?
I feel alone.
I feel like a bother and hurt, but not hurt and I know it’s in my mind.
I know I Jump to far, it’s gonna get me hurt. Maybe killed.
But what if that’s okay?

I’m just ranting to rant cause I don’t want to say this face to face. To anyone. I know whom ever these might be meant for may read these one day. But I don’t even know who that might be who’d care?

Not like people don’t care, not like they don’t notice or don’t say anything or ask questions. You’ll know as you read. Everything. But could anyone truly understand?